Answering questions at Boston College O’Neill Library
First, find a friend. Second, see if the friendship develops into something more. Finding a boyfriend or girlfriend is basically the same process. If you are unsure where to find other gay/bi guys, you could start with BC resources: bit.ly/BCLGBTQ.  Even the Commonwealth has a website for LGBTQ youth: bit.ly/ma-lgbtq.
Presumably, she thinks you look good in it, so that’s something to keep in mind. But the whole “make” thing seems off. If you really don’t like it you should feel comfortable saying so. Cheerful and direct is the best way. It won’t be as bad as you think, and if it is there’s something else going on.
I’m sorry you’re feeling neglected on snapchat. Maybe others are wondering the same thing and what you need to do is respond to them? Or maybe if snapchat isn’t working for making connections with people, you can try a different channel. I see people staring at their phones as they walk by me all day and night, and I wonder whether they’re connecting sufficiently. Don’t forget the talking-to-people channel.
Your chances will improve greatly if she likes you back. However, you may want to temper your approach until you know how willing she is to help you.
Nothing? Priests take vows for a reason, and it would be ethical to respect those vows. You might want to ask yourself why you’re attracted to someone who is prevented from reciprocating your affection. I kind of understand it, though: priests are often intelligent, caring, and interesting… features we’d all want in a partner. Think about the features you find attractive, and look for them among people who haven’t taken vows.
It’s your call, but one thing that rarely works is changing people, so you’d probably have to decide to live with the cheating if you stick with him. Seeing you there posting this, I just felt so strongly you deserve to be treated better than this. Maybe you can just be friends?
I’m sorry you’re feeling lonely in the love department. Encourage yourself to go to social events & meet people, get involved in conversations, listen, do things you enjoy, offer to share activities you enjoy with other people, and above all, have faith that getting to know people, which is an end in itself & a joy, can also eventually lead to romance.
No, RAs are not permitted to have romantic relationships with the residents of their res, according to Jake Cusick, Housing Assignment Specialist at ResLife. So I guess you have to let this one pass. Crushes do fade in time.
Plato, that big name philosopher born 427-ish BCE? (bit.ly/SEP-plato) No. Some guy named Plato, maybe? Ask him if he’s interested. Fingers crossed.
I won’t say it’s not a difficult situation, but there is help and hope and a future. I’d contact BC’s LGBTQ student support: bit.ly/LBGTQBC. Also, there are many resources for partners available here: bit.ly/PartnerTrans. Wishing you both strength and happiness.
![Why do girls enjoy getting pet so much? [Response: Because we do]](https://library.bc.edu/answerwall/wp-content/uploads/2018/10/aw102518-3.jpg)
Isn’t it wonderful when you have someone like that in your life? Make sure you let her know how much you value her!
Be interested in someone’s story. Ask questions. Be a good listener. Reveal yourself. Suggest an outing. And sometimes go with the flow and let your friend direct the plan. But first check your pulse: are you depleted or overwhelmed? You may not be in a place to be that friend.
Communicate, but don’t suffocate. Give him enough breathing room to miss you, and most importantly enjoy your own semester even though you’ll miss him!
I don’t think so. Freshman year is such a great period of exploration in general. I would, however, caution about getting so involved with someone freshman year that you limit your other activities. On the other hand, dating seems like a much better option than the hook-up culture, so kudos to you for thinking about it.
Of course! It’s Fall. But sometimes it’s hard to let go of the fear of failure and rejection, as in the classic Chris Isaak song “Wicked Game”: “No I don’t want to fall in love (this girl is only gonna break your heart).” Confide in some good friends, and then take the plunge. May you succeed & feel that rush! If your love isn’t requited, well, that’s why you confided in your friends. They’ll be ready with whatever can console you.
It’s as simple as offering it yourself. Or it’s as complicated as all these poems about unrequited love make it: bit.ly/poems-unrequited. May you find the love you need.
Yes. Also, your s/o does not get to tell you how to feel about it, in case that’s relevant.
Oh dear! Run, don’t walk and don’t let the cheater take up any more of your time and emotional energy. There is someone out there who will treat you with the respect you deserve.
Probably not, unfortunately. As you may have noticed if you have been around for a while, the Wall has a privacy policy when it comes to identifying anyone who would not be considered a celebrity or public person. That means we would have to cross out/redact any identifying names and pictures. And that would put a definite crimp in a library crush board!
