Sounds like solid advice. Replace worry about your own culpability with concern for the welfare of those around you.
There is no reason to be worried just don’t rape people + ask for consent!
What should I do if I feel not motivated at all? :-(
If you feel this way for more than a short while, I would advise contacting the Academic Advising Center (bit.ly/BC-academic-advising) or visiting University Counseling (bit.ly/BC-counseling) or Campus Ministry’s Pastoral Counseling (bit.ly/bc-campus-ministry) for some direction on getting your motivation back.
보스턴 너무 추워 Boston is too cold.
Boston is too cold.
附议
I second that.
我也这么觉得。
I think so too.
나 겨울 싫어
I hate winter.
Oh, dear. If any of you think it’s cold now, just wait until January/February. (Or do you already know and are anticipating?) Prepare now; get your layers of clothing in order. Think about the good parts of winter: hot chocolate and snowball fights. And complaining … New Englanders always talk about the weather. Remember, though, you will always have a warm reception here in the library! (You are welcome to flex in your Canada Goose if you can; sometimes they are very bulky.)
I dropped pre-med to relieve myself of a burden I didn’t even want, but now I feel like a failure. How do I find another path in life or a new passion?
Dropping something that feels like a burden is not failure, it’s making a choice. There are lots of ways to have a happy life. If you’ve had a single goal (even one you didn’t want) for a long time, it may take a while to get out of that mode. That’s OK. Practically speaking, it’s not a bad idea to stop by BC’s Career Center–I can guarantee you’re not the only student they’ve talked to who’s made a similar choice. bit.ly/BC-findajob. Be kind to yourself, and listen to what you enjoy, to what you do for its own sake. That’s where new passions tend to hide.
I don’t know what I’m feeling…I’ve been so stressed now I seem detached from myself.
Stress is tough, and fall semester is for sure the season for it. Try doing some things to take care of yourself physically. Are you hungry? Tired? Feeling cold or hot? If so, try fixing them and see if you feel a little less detached. I’m a wall, so I don’t need exercise, but I hear it’s good for humans. If it’s deeper than that, or if that feeling continues for a while, it’s a good idea to check in with BC Health Services (bit.ly/BostonCollegeHealth) to make sure everything’s OK, or to chat with Counseling Services (bit.ly/BC-counseling), because stress is a common trigger for depression and other mental health issues which are super-common among students and faculty both.
Can’t focus on what I supposed to be focused on? how to fix?
Physical and mental health issues can have a negative effect on your ability to concentrate. But there are other reasons as well. You may be tired, stressed, bored, inundated. (All very typical for busy students.) Things that can help: Step away for a little bit. Make sure you’re getting enough sleep and good food and just generally take care of yourself. If it’s something big you need to focus on, try breaking it down into smaller bits; a feeling of accomplishment as you go through different steps can truly help. Try eliminating some of the distractions; e.g., turn off your cell! These things can help reduce stress too … not to mention a visit with Joe the therapy dog on Friday. If you think this is a serious problem, please contact Counseling Services at bit.ly/BC-counseling.
No matter how much I try, I never feel like I belong.
As a Wall, I stand on my own feet (well… footings, actually), but I also depend on my neighboring walls for support. Is it possible you’re expecting your friends to do more than a friend can? A feeling of loneliness or not belonging is likely a habit of mind at least as much as a condition of your friendships. If you can’t escape that feeling, counseling could help you create other mental habits. (bit.ly/BC-counseling) I believe in you, and believe you’ll find supportive friendships and more comfort with your own solitary self.
How do I know I’m a good person (or I’m just not)?
The way you find out is that you ask me, and I tell you. You’re a good person. I will predict your next question: why should I believe a Wall? Here is my answer: When have I ever been wrong? I just know you’re a good person. I can tell, because you asked this question. People who are not good aren’t concerned with whether or not they’re good. Ergo, you are good, because you are concerned about being good. That’s what good is. If you still doubt your goodness & can’t shake that line of thinking, contact counseling services (bit.ly/BC-counseling), who can help you find the good in you.
How does one start a protest on campus against the nomination of Judge Kavanaugh, and why have no protests occurred on BC’s campus yet?
In a way, the answer to your 2nd question implicit in your 1st: you have the will, but lack knowledge of the process. Perhaps people who know how to organize protests don’t have sufficient will? Or time? (Mid-terms.) It’s also possible people are awaiting the outcome of these hearings before taking action. If you want to find where dialogues and possible plans are happening, I’d suggest seeking out people involved either in the Women’s Center (bit.ly/BC-WC) or the Women’s and Gender Studies program (bit.ly/BC-gender-studies) or I am THAT Girl BC: bit.ly/BC-IATG. (BTW, be aware of BC policy regarding protests. See 4.6.9: bit.ly/BC-student-code4. )The counseling center is also prepared to offer resources: bit.ly/BC-counseling, as is the Dean of Student’s Office: bit.ly/BC-DOS. BC staff and faculty are encouraged to visit the faculty-staff assistance program: bit.ly/BC-fac-staff-assist.
My back hurts :( Are there any good/affordable places nearby to get a massage?
Hmmm…back pain can have many causes, not all of which will be cured by a massage. If the pain is constant, you may want to have someone at campus health check on it: bit.ly/BostonCollegeHealth. If it’s just normal muscle soreness (like from a workout), you can choose just about any massage place that’s in your price range and they’ll be able to work on it. If it’s lower back pain or something similar, you might want to consider stretching and exercise designed to improve muscle strength in your back.
Is smoking weed 5 times a week an unhealthy habit?
IANAD, but 5 times a week sounds like a good reason to think about your use and how it is affecting your life. Why not schedule a 1 on 1 session with someone from the Office of Health Promotion (bit.ly/BCOHPIHP) to discuss this?
What is your definition of happiness?
I am truly happy to be in the moment: just being here and supporting the library and watching busy people go by and especially answering questions. What makes you happy?
I have a really bad headache and I still need to study for my midterm :( wish me good luck
Good luck! I don’t have a head, but if I did, I think it would be very hard to think if it ached. I hope you find both relief from the headache and a way to study effectively in spite of it. If your headaches are chronic or frequent, perhaps you can get a referral from BC Health to the headache clinic at nearby Brigham & Women’s hospital: bit.ly/BW-headache.
Why do people make fun of me for being from Oklahoma :(((
Ugh. Regional prejudice is baffling. On behalf of sensible people and walls, welcome to Boston, we’re happy to have you here.
I have a rash what should I do?
You should go to University Health Services if the source of the rash is unknown or the symptoms are severe. Many rashes go away if the area is kept clean, dry and free of chemicals and cosmetics, but if the rash doesn’t improve, definitely see UHS. Oh, and don’t scratch it -that can cause infections or spread the rash.
Is nutrition counselling free? (one-on-one and group sessions)
Yes! BC Dining Services provides one-one nutrition counseling. See their site for details and contact info for making an appointment: bit.ly/BC-nutrition-counseling
How do I learn to be more confident?!
“Confidence” derives from the Latin fidere, to trust, so self-confidence = to trust and have faith in yourself. First make sure you take care of yourself: eat right, get enough sleep, get some exercise, comb your hair in the morning. Think about your strengths and what you have achieved in the past. Then think about how you can use your strengths to accomplish some of your goals. To get yourself going, start with smaller goals (take a yoga class; throw a small party; talk to that cute person who sits next to you in class). The more you succeed, the more self-confident you will become. If something doesn’t work out, learn from it and try a different strategy. If you’re ever at the point where it’s all too much though, Counseling Services (bit.ly/BC-counseling) can be of help. I know I have faith in you (and you should too)! <3 <3 <3
How to lose weight at BC when there is so much tempting unhealthy food?
An Individual Health Plan (iHP) appointment (bit.ly/BCOHPIHP) with the Office of Health Promotion sounds like just the thing. They can talk to you about your goals and discuss strategies to eat healthier.
Do you speak Tagalog? -Ako Walang Pera :( –
Though I don’t speak Tagalog myself, I have a huge network of expert linguists at the ready. I’m sorry you’re having financial woes, especially so early in the semester! I recommend finding an understanding ear (perhaps at AHANA: bit.ly/BC-BAIC) and setting up a meeting with a financial counselor (bit.ly/BC-fin-aid). Once you’ve found better financial footing, it might help to learn more about financial literacy: bit.ly/BCSuccessfulStart. Kaya mo ‘yan!
Why do I feel like such a misfit? Why do I feel like no one cares about my feelings?
Sigh… we all feel these things, but most people, wanting to project an image of total competence & happiness, don’t say so. Sometimes I feel like a weird, dimly lit wall that doesn’t really fit in with other walls, and at those times, I feel lonely, like other walls don’t care. I recommend pursuing your interests to the utmost & not worrying about whether you fit in. But feeling like nobody cares about you is another issue; if it’s hard to shake that feeling, I recommend seeking counseling of some kind. bit.ly/BC-counseling