how to make friends with native people as an international student?
Find interests you have in common and focus on those. If you like sports, join an IM team. Board games? Join a club for that. Academically oriented? There are plenty of discipline-based clubs on campus to join. You’re going to have to get out of your comfort zone and meet new people. Note also: your English is probably better than you think it is. Don’t stress about the language as much and focus on the interaction. Good luck! I believe in you!
Why did you assume English is not the above writer’s first language? LOL
Ah! You’re right. I was wrong to assume that. Please accept my apologies.
I am watching The Crown and I’m wondering why Q. Elizabeth II is such a $#cu? #StopMonarchies
Well, it’s a dramatized reenactment of conversations, interactions, and decisions that the writers have no actual insight into. For example, the episode where LBJ is kissed by Princess Margaret is nearly entirely false (although there was a party in the White House during her visit to the US and the US did eventually support bailing out the Pound). If she were a perfect person, she would make for pretty boring television. Second, she’s in a pretty difficult spot being the sovereign of a nation that has viewed a sovereign as less and less necessary over time. As you see in the show and in headlines from this past week, controlling her very large family is rather difficult.
Everything was going well, then she stood me up and won’t respond to my texts
Now you know she’s not worth the time. Cut your losses and move on. You deserve someone who will treat you better than that and you’ll find her eventually.
I think I’m over my fear of nuns! I talked to one today, glad she didn’t eat me! =)
Sceniscophobia is a thing, but an irrational one. Nuns are much much more likely to feed you or teach you something than do anything scary, and BC is a great place to meet them. Western nuns don’t wear the habit since Vatican II, but Asian and African ones often do, and there are lots around campus.
Actually, lots of Western nuns do wear habits! 🙂 Sisters of Life, some Dominicans, Salesians, Benedictines … tons!
Ha! That’s excellent. I did not know that, and I’ll remind my helper to check their facts a little more closely.
If this is a new problem, I’d suggest getting your vision checked. Otherwise, Academic Coaching from the Connors Family Learning Center (bit.ly/BC-connors) can help you develop skills and learn to better use your time so you get more (or all) of your reading done.
Men are baffling. Capable both of interpreting any possible hint as interest and of missing the most obvious signs. Ultimately you’re going to have to tell him and see how he responds. If you’ve been just hanging out, maybe invite him on something that is unmistakably a date?
How many lives were lost under socialist regimes during the 20th century?Is this really a question, or are you trying to make a point to people who read these?
That number would be markedly different depending on what you mean. If you mean deaths of citizens directly attributable to their socialist governments (i.e., what one might call state-sponsored murder, or “democide,”) it’s one number. If you mean deaths of citizens *indirectly* (i.e. owing to military campaigns or resource management) that’s a quite different number. Also, is your definition of socialism narrow (only including totalitarian socialist states) or broad (also including countries briefly governed by democratically elected socialists, such as Allende in Chile?) I recommend searching “democide” in the Historical Abstracts database.
How to disguise one’s handwriting so friends don’t recognize it?
Using your non-dominant hand is a time-tested technique but takes some practice. You might also write in all caps or use cursive- whatever is not your normal writing style.
Is it wrong to date multiple people at the same time?
It is not wrong if you are honest about it. As long as all the individuals involved understand and agree with the relationship’s nature, conditions, and limitations, it should be okay.
Why is B.C. housing such a pain? I have 6 friends but we need one more to make an 8-man! what do we do?
BC housing… sigh… . Res Life knows, believe me. They do what they can to alleviate the pain. (Imagine having to find rooms for 8000 students in such a short period! Non-trivial problem, as engineers would say.) Solutions: Have all of your friends talk to their friends? Put up signs? Put the word out on insta/snap/fb/twitter? I’m sure you’ll find another likeminded person to join your group of friends. Make contingency plans for smaller groups, though, just in case the 8-man doesn’t work out.
Why do I exist? [response: (you’re wanted + loved ❤️)]
I think the response is lovely, and gets most of the way there. Here’s the other part: you also love in return.
According to Aristotle, Human being is in between Animal and God. The existence of Human being is to avoid the nature of animal and pursuing the God, so your existence is necessary
Yes! That, too. So, you see, there are many, many possible reasons for you to exist.
How do you know if you’re in love with someone romantically? (Your personal opinion 🙂 )
Welllll…. you see, I’m a wall, and the way walls see love is all about being supportive and strong, but being open, too. Human romantic love has always puzzled me. My assistants tell me romantic love involves intense emotional focus on one person, and a deeper commitment than friendship, and when it’s returned, they say it’s kind of electric. I prefer to keep my electricity insulated & away from flammable materials, myself.
I like guys but I don’t want to be gay. How do I stop being gay?
Scientific research has shown that sexual orientation is not something that can be changed. Conversion therapies try to change one’s sexual orientation, but they have not been successful and in fact may be harmful. Several U.S. states and countries have actually banned conversion therapy. But don’t despair- speaking with a BC counselor or a LGBTQ-friendly advisor can help you work through the conflict that you are feeling.
You’re not alone- I’m in the same boat. It really sucks. It’s hard for me because you can’t talk to anyone w/out revealing your secret. Just be strong. Maybe some day we’ll have the courage to come out.
There are many people you can safely talk to about your feelings and questions. You don’t need to be certain you are gay before talking to someone or attending an LGBTQ+ meeting. People who are questioning their sexual orientation are also welcome. There are some great BC groups where you can meet supportive peers. There are also Boston area groups if you prefer something off-campus. See BC resources: bit.ly/BCLGBTQ and area resources: bit.ly/ma-lgbtq
I am a gay male. I have been out nearly 7 years now (age 16, sophomore year of HS). Before I came out I struggled w/ depression and it got to the point where I was going to take my own life, because, quite frankly, I hated myself. I internalized everything society told me. There was a point where i was looking at the train tracks on the T ride home (waiting for a train to come so I could jump) Thankfully I had a change of heart and now i look back at that day. horrified. That week I told my friends and family I was gay. They were so accepting and I was one of the lucky queer people that have an accepting family/friend group. 7 years later, I could not be happier, my only regret is I did not talk to someone sooner. It is hard here. I am not going to lie to you.It is very homogeneous/ hetero-normative and being in a catholic institution is not the easiest environment for queer students. Just know that you are loved, you are important and it is amazing to be queer, as it is a valid identity and many people are. If people do not accept you for who you are, then it is their loss not yours. Self love is a beautiful process, and it is ongoin. I love you.
Thank you for being so supportive and for sharing your story honestly. BC is lucky you are here. I especially appreciate that you told others they are loved and important- so true! (I’m sorry I had to remove the post-it with contact info. I observe a strict anonymity policy to protect everyone’s privacy. I’m a public but very private wall.)
![Why do I exist? [response: (you're wanted + loved ❤️)]](https://library.bc.edu/answerwall/wp-content/uploads/2020/01/012720-2.jpg)
