How do I ask for better communication? And how do I know when enough is enough?

How do I ask for better communication? And how do I know when enough is enough?
How do I ask for better communication? And how do I know when enough is enough?

Put the lack of communication in context of its consequences, e.g., “You didn’t tell me seeing this movie was the most important thing to you this month, so I thought it was negotiable. It seems like you expect me to just know what you’re thinking or feeling, which sets me up for failure.” You can always ask for better communication. (Others can ask it of you, too.) If you keep asking, and it keeps not happening… it’s also up to you when you’ve had enough. Everyone has flaws. A wise person once said to me about picking a life partner: you know they’re a keeper if you can put up with their flaws and you can’t live without their virtues.

How can I be happier, nicer, stronger, better?

How can I be happier, nicer, stronger, better?
How can I be happier, nicer, stronger, better?

What terrific goals! A lot of this is pure mindset, so it’s a good start that you have the intention. To follow through, how about setting up a peer coaching session with the Center for Student Wellness (bit.ly/BC-wellness-coach) and discuss your goals with them?

how would you rate “close to you” by dayglow?

how would you rate "close to you" by dayglow? (out of 10 :) )
how would you rate “close to you” by dayglow? (out of 10 🙂 )

Thanks for sharing – I just listened to it and it is very catchy and appealing. I couldn’t help dancing a little (wonder if anyone saw me – walls don’t often get up and dance in a library lobby.) If I had to rate it, I’d give it a solid 8.

I got completely played by a guy …what do I do?

I got completely played by a guy but we have so m any mutual friends I don't want things to be awk... I'm so hurt but what do I do?
I got completely played by a guy but we have so m any mutual friends I don’t want things to be awk… I’m so hurt but what do I do?

Hugs. The Wall understands that this situation is uncomfortable. A good first step in moving forward is that you’re able to acknowledge to yourself that you are hurt, and the situation is awkward. For a short window you may need some distance from “the player” (both physical and virtual). The Wall is hopeful that with time you will be grateful that you learned, in a short window, that this person was not a long-termer for your energy and love. It’s all data collection for traits to look for (and to avoid) in future relationships.

How can I find my own Applied Psych Prac?

How can I find my own Applied Psych Prac?
How can I find my own Applied Psych Prac?

I would suppose the first step would be to talk to practicum advisors Maddie Reed, Kira Patel and Lauren Milo, and Zina Hodge, Associate Director of Field Placement and Partnership Outreach. They’re the ones with contacts in the area. Talk to all of your professors; they might also have contacts in the area, or ideas. It’s also possible that folks on the board of NEPA could provide a lead.

What should I do if I’m falling for someone who is going to be leaving soon?

What should I do if I'm falling for someone who is going to be leaving soon?
What should I do if I’m falling for someone who is going to be leaving soon?

Ask yourself: would I rather live with a lifetime of regret for not telling them, or with the risks that might follow telling them? One of my assistants has more than a few years under their belt, and has very few regrets for doing things that turned out badly, but many for *not* doing things that seemed risky at the time.

How do I write a paper quickly?

How do I write a paper quickly?
How do I write a paper quickly?

Get super organized. Plan a schedule for getting the work done – with breaks – and stick to it. Contact your subject librarian (library.bc.edu/ask-a-librarian/subject-librarians) for advice on your research. Create an outline before you write. Writing also needs time and reflection, though, so consider making sure you leave more time for your next paper.

Major is right for me?

When will I know that my major is right for me? (drawn frowning face)
When will I know that my major is right for me? ?

Knowing you have the right major can be hard! Here’s an article that may help: https://bit.ly/right-major-11. But keep in mind intro courses might not be a good indicator. Make sure to sign up for a more advanced course (if you have the pre-req’s) with a professor with a good rep before a final judgement. Definitely talk to your advisor, too. And consider visiting the Career Center: bit.ly/BC-career. Hope you find your niche!

Favorite kind of cheese?

What's your favorite kind of cheese?
What’s your favorite kind of cheese?

I love basically all cheese! Cheddar, swiss, goat, brie, muenster, mozzarella! ALL THE CHEESE! My favorite cheese event, though, is the Cooper’s Hill Cheese Rolling and Wake. Google it 🙂

None I'm lactose intolerant.
None I’m lactose intolerant.

One of my helpers tells me that vegan cheeses have improved in variety and quality and cheesiness in recent years; maybe give them a try?

How to get over your ex?

How to get over your ex of 5 years?
How to get over your ex of 5 years?

Give yourself time to grieve, time to be angry, time to be yourself outside of a relationship. Hang out with friends. Have the foods you like. Do some of the things your ex wasn’t into. Five years is longer than lots of marriages, so don’t expect it to be like flipping a switch. Some people can do that, others can’t. Take care of yourself, and best wishes.

I feel so embarrassed when I’m bubbling words

I feel so embarrassed when I'm bubbling words because I'm nervous. Since English is my second language. I feel so bad when I make a fool of myself when speaking with natives.
I feel so embarrassed when I’m bubbling words because I’m nervous. Since English is my second language. I feel so bad when I make a fool of myself when speaking with natives.

Keep in mind that a) English is remarkably difficult, owing to irregular spellings, thousands of words derived from other languages, and speech full of contractions & idioms that don’t necessarily appear in standard written English, and b) those native speakers probably don’t have native fluency in another language. Learning a language is all about forging ahead through errors. Please keep making errors! It’s how you’ll improve. (BTW… I think you might have meant “bungling,” not “bubbling,” but I really like the sound of bubbling!)