How do you confess to liking someone without getting upset afterwards if that person does not feel the same towards you?

How do you confess to liking someone without getting upset afterwards if that person does not feel the same towards you?
How do you confess to liking someone without getting upset afterwards if that person does not feel the same towards you?

Try not to take it personally if someone you like doesn’t feel the same way about you. The fact that you were brave enough to express your feelings is something a lot of people struggle with. Being brave enough to express your feelings should give you inspiration for trying again in the future if things don’t work out.

I’ve been wondering for a while as to why UCS emergency response clinicians has dual role at the School of Social Work,

I've been wondering for a while as to why UCS emergency response clinicians has dual role at the School of Social Work, the people on some of their referrals teach at BC. etc Isn't it kind of awkward for the student to utilize the service? P.S. Nothing against anyone but if it is better to avoid dual relationship?
I’ve been wondering for a while as to why UCS emergency response clinicians has dual role at the School of Social Work, the people on some of their referrals teach at BC. etc Isn’t it kind of awkward for the student to utilize the service? P.S. Nothing against anyone but if its better to avoid dual relationship?

If that’s the case, it does seem like it could be awkward, though I’m sure a crisis counselor in a small community like BC is accustomed to being discreet. I would suppose the SSW and a student could make an arrangement in which they weren’t the student of someone who had responded to them in crisis. If you’re concerned about such an eventuality, talk to UCS about it: bit.ly/BC-counseling.

How do I get to any of the rooftops of BC buildings?

How do I get to any of the rooftops of BC buildings? Any place to relax? ❤️❤️❤️
How do I get to any of the rooftops of BC buildings? Any place to relax? ❤️❤️❤️

My diagonally-oriented distant cousins the roofs are very hush-hush about their access points because they don’t want to harm anyone, and are aware they’re both dangerous and tempting destinations to humans who like views & solitude. If you like heights and views, my 5th floor windows are quite nice. Or how about a hike up a local hill instead? I recommend Peters Hill in Arnold Arboretum (not far & an easy walk) or the Blue Hills for something a little more challenging (also further & not on public transit).

I want to know why acknowledging that Taiwan and Hong Kong are not countries,. which, in fact, they’re not, would be a form of “oppression”.

I want to know why acknowledging that Taiwan and Hong Kong are not countries,. which, in fact, they're not, would be a form of "oppression" |^| ???? That's just the official undisputed state of things.
I want to know why acknowledging that Taiwan and Hong Kong are not countries,. which, in fact, they’re not, would be a form of “oppression” |^| ???? That’s just the official undisputed state of things.
Sure it might be justified in some arguments to list them separately, but there's no reason at all to list them as "countries",. That's a factual mistake.
Sure it might be justified in some arguments to list them separately, but there’s no reason at all to list them as “countries”, that’s a factual mistake.

I’d encourage you to get in touch with the Office of International Students by email to make sure your view is heard.

Accidentally knew a friend going through depression but not close to them. How to help?

Accidentally knew a friend going through depression but not close to them. How to help? Thanks
Accidentally knew a friend going through depression but not close to them. How to help? Thanks

I would say making the effort to communicate and offering support are some of the best things you can do for someone who is depressed. Your attempts to reach out may be met with some unpleasant reactions, but I would still say showing that you‘re willing to help someone who‘s dealing with something like depression can hopefully go a long way with helping someone overcome a negative mindset.

St. Paul’s in BAMD

St. Paul's in BAND
St. Paul’s in BAMD

If you’re talking about iDKHOW, I’m not sure where St. Paul comes in. And vice versa. You have done a rare thing. You have baffled the Answer Wall. Poll: Is this post talking about: A) An actual saint named Paul B) iDKHOW C) Duh! It’s so obvious.

How do I get to the gasson bell tower?

How do I get to the gasson bell tower?
How do I get to the gasson bell tower?

My cousin the bell tower, in spite of their frequent ringing, is mute on the subject of access. There’s a clue (bit.ly/bells-clue) but it predates renovation. Here’s a bit of a virtual tour: http://bit.ly/BCM-gasson, and another: http://bit.ly/burnsblog-gasson.

I’m taking Quantum Mechanics but am not convinced it’s real. What do you think?

I'm taking Quantum Mechanics but am not convinced it's real. What do you think?
I’m taking Quantum Mechanics but am not convinced it’s real. What do you think?

My helper is typing up this answer on a computer whose microchips involve quantum mechanics, and looking at the words on an LED screen which does too. But there’s really no way to know unless you take the class. Except that once you do, that changes the experimental conditions. It’s complicated. Here, read about a cat. http://bit.ly/bc-qm

In response to OISS email:

In response to OISS email: I echo that BC should continue to list Taiwan, Hong Kong, and China seperately on the statistic website. Making the changes would be a form of oppression towards students from other non-China country. It would be very unwise during this sensitive time in regards to the Hong Kong protest as well.
In response to OISS email: I echo that BC should continue to list Taiwan, Hong Kong, and China seperately on the statistic website. Making the changes would be a form of oppression towards students from other non-China country. It would be very unwise during this sensitive time in regards to the Hong Kong protest as well.

I recommend you let OISS know directly by emailing them. I’m sure they’re hearing different perspectives on this issue. For those not in the know, the Office of International Students and Scholars at BC (bc.edu/offices/oiss) reports on numbers of students from different countries. Currently, the data differentiates the People’s Republic of China (PRC) from Hong Kong, Macau, and Taiwan; the PRC officially does not recognize these entities as separate from the PRC.

Why is BC counseling so overrun?

Why is BC counseling so overrun? I've been struggling with suicidal thoughts and they said that someone isn't free to see me until December. Wow. I feel so valued.
Why is BC counseling so overrun? I’ve been struggling with suicidal thoughts and they said that someone isn’t free to see me until December. Wow. I feel so valued.
That was my experience last year as well!! You can reach out to the on-call PEC though, they will always have people that you can talk to in a timely manner. Or maybe crisis text line? text 741741 ... their wait time is shorter than other hotlines, usually within 5 minutes~
That was my experience last year as well!! You can reach out to the on-call PEC though, they will always have people that you can talk to in a timely manner. Or maybe crisis text line? text 741741 … their wait time is shorter than other hotlines, usually within 5 minutes~

It’s not just BC, mental health services at lots of schools are having trouble keeping up with increasing need for their services. http://bit.ly/bc-mental. WGBH also has a recent series on mental health at local schools http://bit.ly/bc-mental2. The suggestions above my note are solid ones that you can use immediately. And I see you. You are not alone.

Support Groups are more frequent and less crowded. + ask them to refer you to an off-campus therapist if you have blue cross Blue Shield
Support Groups are more frequent and less crowded. + ask them to refer you to an off-campus therapist if you have blue cross Blue Shield

These are good ideas! I’ll see if my assistants can bring back my sidekick.

I hope you have a positive experience w/ UCS =) They're all nice people working really hard to care for students. BTW, Answer Wall ~ can we get the "kindness board" that you put up right next to you back here ~ looks like many ppl needs it!!!!
I hope you have a positive experience w/ UCS =) They’re all nice people working really hard to care for students. BTW, Answer Wall ~ can we get the “kindness board” that you put up right next to you back here ~ looks like many ppl needs it!!!!

How do I approach a suitemate with some things that are bothering me without hurting her feelings?

How do I approach a suitemate with some things that are bothering me without hurting her feelings?
How do I approach a suitemate with some things that are bothering me without hurting her feelings?

First, let go of feeling responsibility for her reaction. It may sound cold & unfeeling, but you aren’t responsible anyone’s feelings but your own. That said, you can present your concerns in ways that are less or more effective or compassionate. Start with “I” statements; describe how you reacted & felt. Avoid “you” statements, which will be perceived as accusatory and likely encourage defensiveness. Finally, before you talk, clarify for yourself what your precise concerns are, and what you’re looking for in a response.

When should I get married?

When should I get married?
When should I get married?

Clichéd as it sounds, you should get married when you and your partner both feel ready to make such a massive commitment. Relationships are very unique, so while there may be common trends, (age, societal standing, peer pressure, etc.) it’s fundamentally important that you are comfortable with the idea.

I think I may have been emotionally abused?

I think I may have been emotionally abused? Back home. I'm worried about my little brother. Any advice?
I think I may have been emotionally abused? Back home. I’m worried about my little brother. Any advice?

I’m really sorry to hear that. I recommend visiting counseling services (bit.ly/counseling). They can assess your situation and provide counseling and advice, and should be able to provide guidance about what you can do for your brother. (((((Wall Hug)))))

How do I know if I should break up? I can’t see us together long-term and I don’t want to become the kind of person he is.

How do I know if I should break up? I can't see us together long-term and I don't want to become the kind of person he is.
How do I know if I should break up? I can’t see us together long-term and I don’t want to become the kind of person he is.

Ideally, communicating about your doubts will give you a better idea about what decision you should make. In regards to the future, what you see may be very different from what he sees. Discussing what you both want from your relationship hopefully leads to you making an informed decision about your futures.

How to accept your (own) flaw? One you have no control over.

How to accept your own flaw? One you have no control over.
How to accept your own flaw? One you have no control over.

One possibility is to think of it as a challenge, and all challenges are character-building. What you do to adapt to the flaw becomes part of your character – perhaps even one of the best parts of your character – that you wouldn’t have without the flaw. In essence, turn the “flaw” into a source of growth, something that anyone without that flaw doesn’t get to experience. Another possibility: recognize that everyone has limitations of one kind or another, many of them invisible. IOW, you aren’t alone in the challenge of accepting yourself as you are.