Answering questions at Boston College O’Neill Library
I’m sorry you’re hurt, but I’m sure you will also recover, and reasonably certain the process of recovering will teach you that you have capacities you weren’t aware of and reveal friends you didn’t know you had. Depend on yourself and depend on friends and family. You’ve got this. If you find the hurt remains longer than expected, consider counseling: bit.ly/BC-counseling
I’m sorry the flawed health care system is troublesome, and I’m sorry my answer was unsatisfactory. You might be interested in the book Insane consequences: How the mental health industry fails the mentally ill, by D.J. Jaffe (Social Work Library RC455 .J28 2017). If I understand it correctly, a recent law (part of the 21st Century Cures act, signed in December 2016 – for a summary of relevant law, look here: (bit.ly/HR2646)) relaxed restrictions on HIPAA/FERPA to allow providers to share some information with caregivers (i.e. family), to avoid healthcare problems worsened by confidentiality. I’m always sorry to hear about solutions that also cause problems. The world is complicated that way. When things that impact my life are out of my control and answers are unsatisfactory, I turn to friends for support, and often also turn to Reinhold Niebuhr’s serenity prayer: “Give us courage to change what must be altered, serenity to accept what cannot be helped, and the insight to know the one from the other.”
You might have missed this answer from 9/26: Hair loss could have many underlying causes, many of them genetic and irreversible. (More info: bit.ly/mayo-baldness) Even treatment for reversible hair loss has only had moderate success. A particular type of hair loss (alopecia areata) occurs starting in childhood, and is the result of an otherwise benign autoimmune disorder. A recent review of the literature (bit.ly/bc-alopecia) found moderate success with some treatments for this condition. If it’s irreversible, at least know that I think bald humans look wise & sophisticated.
It’s not mean to say that you’re feeling that counseling is useless, as long as you know that that may not be true for everyone in counseling. If you don’t feel you’re getting much (or anything) from counseling, try addressing it directly and telling your counselor what you would like to gain from your sessions. This may mean adjusting your current counseling, or looking for someone new to talk to who is a better fit, but it’s worth it to feel like you’re making progress and getting what you need.
Humans between the ages of 13 and 25 often do need more sleep than other humans, but 13 hours daily does seem excessive. I recommend visiting a doctor to make sure there’s not a health problem of some kind.
It works for me very well, but for you living and breathing (and needing food and sleep and showers) types, I think it would get very unpleasant pretty quickly!
Occasional smelly farts are normal and usually caused by something you ate. If you introduced something new into your diet, that may be the culprit. If you have very foul smelling gas, it could be signs of a digestive track problem or allergy- a visit to the doctor may be in order if it persists.
College is an especially stressful and tiring time of life. There are a lot of pressures to succeed, and every failure feels like it will derail your entire life. Many people do find that a weight is lifted after graduation once they settle into the routine of work and life outside of school. But that will bring its own joys and problems. For now, if you’re feeling overwhelmed, I suggest talking to someone in Counseling Services (bit.ly/BC-counseling) who can help put some perspective on things or just be a sounding board to talk to.
I’m sorry you’re in this difficult situation, and I hope you find a way to navigate it that continues to lead to your healing from childhood trauma. I wish my assistants and I were in a position to advocate for you, but any answers you’ve already gotten from UCS or DOS are no different from answers we would get ourselves. Your path is difficult, but I have faith that you’ll continue to get help in spite of these difficulties and emerge stronger and more resilient.
Life can be exhausting when it comes at you fast. There’s a break coming up; I recommend you use it as a genuine break. Unplug, give yourself some “me”-time/down-time. Meanwhile, every day set aside some time – even just a few minutes – to sit peacefully and do nothing but breathe. Some really great short meditations are available with the Insight Timer app. It’s like running; if you strain a muscle, you need a break. If you don’t think downtime will cut it, get yourself to the counseling office: bit.ly/BC-counseling.
You have an overwhelming number of important questions; you probably feel more than a little overwhelmed. I recommend talking many of these issues through with someone who can be both sympathetic and objective, and help you determine priorities for addressing and making sense of them. Counseling Services would be a good place to start: bit.ly/BC-counseling. For the dog poop I recommend any detergent plus oxy-clean or bleach, both available at any local grocery or drug store.
It can certainly be startling to see someone else’s internal monologue. Many of us are walking (or standing) around with such internal voices; it takes bravery to make it public, even anonymously, because you never know how people will respond. I was a little surprised myself, but it’s never a mistake to be compassionate.
If you’re concerned, it’s probably worth looking into further. The Office of Health Promotion has some useful info to determine if you have a problem: http://bit.ly/BCDrinking, and then you can follow up with them – they have a variety of programs to help.
Almost everyone feels that way sometimes. But if you feel that way often, or it’s interfering with your ability to enjoy life and do things, I’d have a talk with the folks at University Counseling (bit.ly/BC-counseling) and see if they can’t find some strategies to make you feel more secure and happier about your life.
![Do girls poop? [response: Why?]](https://library.bc.edu/answerwall/wp-content/uploads/2019/09/AW09252019-03-e1569504099578.jpg)
Yes, in fact – can you believe it – girls behave like actual human beings. As to why, the body is fairly adept at taking the nutrients it needs from food, but there’s always stuff left over. Without pooping, things would get pretty uncomfortable pretty fast.
I recommend asking Kathy Duggan at the Connors Family Learning Center (CFLC) 617-552-8093 or dugganka@bc.edu
I’m sorry you feel so down about your capabilities and situation. It sounds like some things haven’t gone well recently. I believe in you, and I know you can recover from this bad moment. I recommend getting help from others, such as at university counseling (bit.ly/BC-counseling). Please know in your heart that you’re capable and always worth the struggle, even though it might not feel that way right now.
Ugh! Sorry that happened. You can see how BC defines sexual harassment and consent in the Student Sexual Misconduct Policy here: bit.ly/BC-sexual-misconduct. If you think you may have been harassed, you are welcome and encouraged to reach out to resources on or off campus that can help. BC’s You Are Not Alone Guide (bit.ly/BC-you-are-not-alone) includes lots of helpful information, including multiple places on campus where you can get information, assistance with reporting, and direct support. If you have any questions about BC policy, talk to Corey Kelly in Student Conduct at 617-552-3470 or corey.kelly@bc.edu or Melinda Stoops, Student Affairs Title IX Coordinator at 617-552-3482 or melinda.stoops@bc.edu
I am not a doctor, but advice from the National Library of Medicine’s Medline Plus (bit.ly/NLMColds) is to rest, drink fluids, gargle with salt water, use cough drops, and try OTC medicines for pain and colds. There is also some limited evidence for benefits from some complementary approaches, including oral zinc, rinsing the nose/sinuses, vitamin C, probiotics, and meditation. There are some warnings attached to some of these – see details: bit.ly/NIHAlt4Colds.
Certainly, if you show signs of alcohol poisoning (from the Mayo Clinic bit.ly/HungoverOuch ): confusion, vomiting, seizures, slow or irregular breathing, blue-tinged skin or pale skin, low body temperature, difficulty remaining conscious or losing consciousness. Consider seeking help, maybe through the Ofc. of Health Promotion (bit.ly/BC-health-promo), for your drinking if this is not a one-time thing.
? I wish I could offer you a shoulder, because the shoulder of a friend is oftena good crying spot. If you want to cry alone, some humans use the shower. Others might go for a walk in the woods, perhaps the Hammond Pond Conservation Area, which you can access via a path from Suffolk Road, or the Webster Woods, accessible via the Hammond Pond Parkway.
