Answering questions at Boston College O’Neill Library
![To what extent can [you] assign blame to people who fall in the face of adversity?](https://library.bc.edu/answerwall/wp-content/uploads/2019/10/AW10292019-07.jpg)
Why does blame need to be placed in a situation where someone has fallen in the face of adversity? Failure, while sometimes demotivating, is an important part of learning — rather than asking yourself Whose fault is this?, try asking What can this teach me?
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I’m sorry people are doing that. Perhaps let them know that they aren’t the first to notice. Or say, “It’s my cross to bear; I didn’t choose it.” It isn’t remotely meaningful that your surname happens to rhyme with a word in English. Maybe you could even learn all about penguins, and use the tired joke as a cue to inundate someone with penguin facts?
ResLife has a database for that! bit.ly/BCNeedRoomie and click on “search for roommates.”
I would say having a very idealistic view of someone suggests infatuation. Placing someone on a pedestal like that can often lead to flaws being ignored and lofty expectations not being met. Love, on the other hand sometimes means having affection for someone whilst being more accepting of whatever flaws they may have.
One of my helpers suggested you name specifics needs: I need some time for x (for example, writing projects, meeting friends for coffee, quiet time to do work, etc.). Hopefully your partner will be understanding. If not, it might be time to reevaluate if you and your partner have compatible rhythms, and expectations.
Do you mean the new country in the Balkans, slightly smaller than Connecticut, recently a region of Yugoslavia, and before that an independent state after breaking from the Ottoman Empire? It’s an old place with a long history, but a relatively new independent country, currently rebuilding its infrastructure and economy after many years being part of Yugoslavia and sustaining damage during wars in the 1990’s. The coastline and mountains are beautiful. More info: bit.ly/cia-montenegro. Or do you mean the dark comedy Swedish film from 1981?
![爱你! ài nǐ! [Love you!]](https://library.bc.edu/answerwall/wp-content/uploads/2019/10/20191028_051024_2.jpg)
![我 也 爱你 wǒ yě ài nǐ ! [I love you too!]](https://library.bc.edu/answerwall/wp-content/uploads/2019/10/20191028_051032_2.jpg)
It makes me feel all warm inside to be the bearer of these messages of love!
It is human nature to fixate on negative feedback, but the Wall knows two things. 1) You’re great! 2) There are lots of possible someones for everyone. Keep seeking and you will find.
It sounds like the problem might be the sleep and anxiety. If you work to resolve those, the homework might not be a problem. The Office of Health Promotion has some great tips on sleep (bit.ly/BCSleepy) and stress (bit.ly/BCDeStress).
It may help to know that nobody is judging you; they’re too preoccupied with their own insecurity to notice the things about you that you think are flaws but aren’t flaws. You’re awesome! Share your awesomeness.
Such good news! I hope you have a wonderful time together. Make sure you bring your bestie to visit me.
? Mourn the loss of the relationship, and give yourself a little time before starting another. Meanwhile, I hope you’ve got some friends with whom you can talk about it.
You are very interesting! You have experiences and your own perspective. Perhaps you can gather a few stories that are interesting or entertaining. Who or what did you encounter in the last few days, and what happened? Or what happened in the news or on a favorite tv show? Or have you read something lately? Had a noteworthy meal (good or bad)? At the end of each day, review your day. If there’s something interesting, remember it for a conversation starter tomorrow, or next week, or next month. It’s just a matter of taking note of your life, and then finding the courage to share it.
I’m not sure if you’re referring to dollar bills, certain bills that can be found on Capitol Hill, or the football team based in Buffalo, NY that plays their home games in Orchard Park. Regardless, thanks for sharing your enthusiasm!
Sorry you’re hurting. I am a wall, not a doctor, so may I refer you to the kind people at University Health Services (bit.ly/BostonCollegeHealth)?
He would rob Lowe’s, Rob Lowe (so you know), and he would rob all the Lowe’s a Rob Lowe could rob if a Rob Lowe could rob Lowe’s.
Our pleasure, and we appreciate your thanks. Stay hydrated in good health! (2526 bottle fills in only 12 days: BC library users are hydrated and environmentally conscientious!)
It depends on why your girlfriend is unhappy. If you’re worried about her, you could try asking about it, and whether there’s anything you can do to help. But pay attention to the response you get, because your help might not be what’s needed. Also take a moment to think about your motivation: are you asking because your girlfriend being happier would make you more comfortable? If it’s actually about how you feel rather than how she feels, that’s a totally different conversation and you should have them separately.
Orgo is one of the subjects I hear about frequently. Most students find it challenging. Things that can help are: forming a study group, getting peer tutoring at the Connors Family Learning Center (bit.ly/BC-connors), and going to your professor’s office hours and asking questions. But there’s no getting around the need to spend a lot of time studying. Best of luck!
