The Wall

I’m so sorry to hear that. It makes me think of a very old song, which might make you feel better–that is an old story. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mS9U75YC-jA

Everybody processes that part of their lives differently, and not always on the same schedule as everyone else. If it makes you uncomfortable or causes problems for you it might be worth talking to a therapist or counselor (Campus Health Services can help with that), but I’m reading more puzzlement than distress in your question. Be yourself, you’ll be fine.

Why does blame need to be placed in a situation where someone has fallen in the face of adversity? Failure, while sometimes demotivating, is an important part of learning — rather than asking yourself Whose fault is this?, try asking What can this teach me?

I’m sorry people are doing that. Perhaps let them know that they aren’t the first to notice. Or say, “It’s my cross to bear; I didn’t choose it.” It isn’t remotely meaningful that your surname happens to rhyme with a word in English. Maybe you could even learn all about penguins, and use the tired joke as a cue to inundate someone with penguin facts?

I would say having a very idealistic view of someone suggests infatuation. Placing someone on a pedestal like that can often lead to flaws being ignored and lofty expectations not being met. Love, on the other hand sometimes means having affection for someone whilst being more accepting of whatever flaws they may have.

One of my helpers suggested you name specifics needs: I need some time for x (for example, writing projects, meeting friends for coffee, quiet time to do work, etc.). Hopefully your partner will be understanding.  If not, it might be time to reevaluate if you and your partner have compatible rhythms, and expectations.

Do you mean the new country in the Balkans, slightly smaller than Connecticut, recently a region of Yugoslavia, and before that an independent state after breaking from the Ottoman Empire? It’s an old place with a long history, but a relatively new independent country, currently rebuilding its infrastructure and economy after many years being part of Yugoslavia and sustaining damage during wars in the 1990’s. The coastline and mountains are beautiful. More info: bit.ly/cia-montenegro. Or do you mean the dark comedy Swedish film from 1981?