TW: interaction between an adult and minor (IDK IF ITS EVEN LEGAL???) IM SORRY THAT THIS IS SUCH A LONG POSt So let me give you some context. I am a 17 yr old gay male and I attend 2 different martial arts classes at the same school. I have made many friends and learned to defend myself pretty well – if I ever get into a situation where I need it. Recently, a student transferred from another school to ours and he’s in both of my classes. He’s pretty chill, and we became friends almost immediately. This was about a week ago. The dude, who we’ll call Joe, is VERY attractive and charismatic, so you’re kinda just drawn to him. Today, I had to ride my bike because my car broke down, and I guess he took the hint that I lived pretty close. He asked me if I wanted a ride home and I politely declined – saying that I could bike. This is where I got the first red flag. He asked me: “Say, where do you live again? I can pull it up on the Maps and get you home.” I was super nervous and just said “oh you dont need to I can ride home – besides, my bike won’t fit in your car (awkward, uncomfortable laughter which is a signal to anyone who can think). After I said that he seemed pretty sad and I felt pretty bad. The part that really irked me is that I never even MENTIONED where I lived??? He wanted to go pick up some sushi at a nearby Kroger (bc kroger has GODLY sushi) and it was a short walk so i agreed. We had some pretty great conversations but he kept nudging me and touching me weird – like putting his arm around me when we were waiting in line. Now, the problem is that he’s literally an adult but since I’m gay he thinks that I’ll fall for anyone; but that isn’t the case. My love language is physical touch and that’s how I express feelings towards my friends, families, and partners, but never to someone I met a week ago. So we leave the store and he makes a very disturbing comment when I walk him back to his car, saying that he’d “love to do something with someone in this car.” I was stunned. I felt so uncomfortable but I’m a nice person and didn’t want to offend him so I said “same to be honest.” I think he took this a little too weirdly because he started looking me up and down, and that’s when I took the time to leave. I told him that its getting dark and I should go home, because I was about 10 minutes late to go home but he kept insisting that we sit in his car to talk and listen to music (i watch a lot of crime movies so like i know for a fact we ain’t gonna chill and i don’t feel like ending up somewhere other than home.) eventually he lets up and I go home but the thing is im gonna have to see him once every day monday-thursday, and twice saturday. it’s just our schedule. I hope he doesn’t make any other moves on my cuz i swear to god i’m thinking of just hitting him and running but he’s so much faster and stronger than me so i just feel so overwhelmed. please advise!!! this sounds like a my story animated video 💀
I’m so sorry someone was touching you without consent and has made you feel threatened. What he did is wrong. I recommend you begin by calling RAINN’s sexual assault hotline: https://www.rainn.org/resources. They can help you process the experience and strategize responses. I hope you feel comfortable telling your parents about this, and I hope the adults in your life, including your martial arts instructors, listen to and validate your legitimate concerns and act quickly and decisively to protect you.