Answering questions at Boston College O’Neill Library
The usual rules apply: it helps to have professional experience, and it likely matters who you know as much as what you can do. The old line is: “Amateurs practice until they get it right; professionals practice until they can’t get it wrong.” For some day-to-day examples of what the life is like, you might try this: bit.ly/bc-inside-pg or this: bit.ly/bc-cyber-athlete. And if you succeed, you might also have a career as a coach: bit.ly/bc-edge
![NY's resolution: Ask out _____ ______ [redacted]](http://library.bc.edu/answerwall/wp-content/uploads/2018/01/aw011818-5.jpg)
That’s a S.M.A.R.T. goal: Specific, Measurable, Assignable… OK, not sure how Realistic, but why worry? And you didn’t specify a Timeframe; hopefully, you won’t use that as a way to avoid your fears by putting it off indefinitely. Good luck! (Sorry about the black pen: no names on the Wall, please.)
Break big goals like that down into small, achievable goals (such as “will draft 3 pages of history paper today”) and focus on them. Intrinsic interest in the subject of study is also important: earning a 4.0 is already like climbing a mountain; if you’re not interested, it’s like climbing a mountain when you’d rather be sailing. Keep in mind, too, that there are many other avenues to success (and other kinds of success) to be had in college: making and keeping long-term friends, for instance, who can help support you throughout the long, successful life in store for you.
I look forward to rooting for the Pixy Sticks!
Ambitious! I believe in you! You’ll have to be parsimonious with your time and attention (put strict limits on social media, tv, and games). You may also want to let friends and family know you might not be as available as usual. Go! Go! Go!
It’s a really good idea to be open to a broad array of relationships: there are many kinds of love other than romantic. I’ve never really understood the phrase “just friends.” Friends are the ones who have your back for years, perhaps even a lifetime, while most romances, though intense, are temporary. The Greeks counted many types of love: friendship, empathic, erotic, and universal are the ones C.S. Lewis wrote about in The Four Loves. (O’Neill call number BV4639 .L45 1988). A Psychology Today article lists 7: bit.ly/7-types-of-love. May you learn to find the love you need.
Good for you! Make a preemptive strike against bad grades, and try tutoring at the Connors Family Learning Center (bit.ly/BC-connors) before you get to the point where you’re struggling. Best wishes for a productive semester.
Discipline is all about getting yourself to do things you resist doing, and/or not to do things you really want to do. So, one could rephrase the question: How do I get myself to do things I don’t want to do, and not to do things I want to do? There’s a recognition implicit in these questions that what we want to do and what we really ought to do are different. So, the first thing you need to do is define your wants and oughts, and perhaps rank them. Which wants are getting in the way of which oughts? It might help also to read what psychologists have learned about deferred gratification. The Marshmallow Test: Mastering Self-Control, by Walter Mischel (BF632 .M57 2014) is a good place to begin.
That sounds like a wonderful book for our collection. I caught the eye of our biology librarian, and suggested it to her, and she is placing an order. You can always contact subject librarians with suggestions (libguides.bc.edu/ask-a-librarian/contact). Another option is to place an interlibrary loan (illiad.bc.edu/illiad/bxm/logon.html) and check “yes” for “Should BC purchase this item”.
I bet that will make you both happier and more productive – great resolution. You could start small, maybe no screens at meals or for a set period each day, and see how that works for you. I hope you will enjoy living outside of the Internet!
Spending more time with friends, whether from work or elsewhere, is always a good idea for humans & Walls. I like to spend time with my friend Express Yo’Self (bit.ly/express-yoself) through facetime. Being nicer is always better than being meaner. Just ask Monte Irvin: Nice Guys Finish First. (O’Neill Library call number: GV865.I78 A3x 1996)
What a laudable goal! One path is to figure out what’s getting in the way of presence: work, social media, conflict avoidance, fear of intimacy, or just a habit of not being present. It’s also worthwhile just asking the ones you love what’s on their minds, or complimenting them. Sometimes, for instance, I take my friend the 3rd Floor for granted, but I should be more present. Floor, I love the way you withstand thousands of footsteps daily without complaint. Thich Nhat Hanh wrote a good book about mindfulness and love: Teachings on Love. (O’Neill Library, Call number: BQ4360 .N4713 1998)
I believe in you, and I think you’ll prove me right: your dreams can come true. If your dreams are career-related, perhaps you could visit BC’s Career Services office (bit.ly/BC-career) and/or The Vault (bit.ly/BC-Vault), a career website (BC login required). We also have many books in O’Neill Library on vocational guidance, located at or near call numbers HF 3581 to HF 3583 on the 4th floor.
