Answering questions at Boston College O’Neill Library
In the United States, the victim does not decide what kind of punishment is appropriate and when it should be delivered. Although the brothers’ abuse claims were substantiated by others, the parents should have been allowed to defend themselves (or plead guilty) in a courtroom. Self-defense is sometimes necessary, but one’s life must be in immediate danger. And it doesn’t help one’s defense if one first blames the murder on the mob.
That can be difficult. When I feel myself getting impatient or angry or frustrated, I try to stop, step back, and breathe (as much as a Wall is able to do those things). Sometimes I need to focus on something else–something nice, like the trees outside the doorway, or something I am grateful for, like all the people who pass by and ask me questions. And sometimes I don’t succeed and am impatient with someone. (Not even the Wall is perfect.)
My friends say the more they can stay stress free and relaxed the less likely they are to become impatient. They recommend regular breathing–usually attached to some meditation or yoga. And staying healthy by eating and sleeping well and getting some exercise (maybe a nice walk around the reservoir). Listening to music–classical or whatever works best for you–can help in situations where you need to wait. Good luck; I think just by asking you are already on the way to being more mindful of yourself and your reactions.
![Why is my friend [redacted] asking for money in venmo?](http://library.bc.edu/answerwall/wp-content/uploads/2018/03/032018-2.jpg)
That’s a pretty uncomfortable situation! Financial services like Venmo which have a social media aspect, and promote payments between friends, can be such a useful thing when sharing bills, or selling items. But when a friend is asking for money on them, it’s hard to know how to respond. How would you respond if your friend was asking for money in person?
Unfortunately, it is all too common to see a loved one make a romantic choice that you may not agree with. There isn’t a lot you can do in this situation, but my advise is that you continue to be there for your friend. This does not mean you have to lie about how you feel about the guy your friend is dating or spend time with him, but just be there for your friend. Talk about other things and try to spend time together away from the guy they are dating. And, if you think that the guy is toxic in a dangerous way, know that there are support structures available for you on campus, including Counseling Services (bit.ly/BC-counseling).
According to this article (bit.ly/NoNoNoreasters), meteorologist Elliot Abrams says it’s due to a blocking pattern up North and the temperature differences between Canada and the Southeast US right now, rather than due to your flight bookings. Actually, he didn’t mention if your flight plans were a factor. I hope you get to get home soon!
Why are you in the library? Hey, you asked the right Wall – I am hardly ever anyplace else (though I am presenting at a conference in May, no kidding!) There are so many opportunities here, to learn about anything, to find some peace, or even to get advice at Career Center drop-in sessions Wednesday & Thursday 2-4 (Level 3 consultation area), if you’re thinking about what comes next. This is the place to be.
I don’t know about you, but I am neither infinitely wide nor infinitely tall. Nor will I live forever. Speed limits keep auto fatalities under control, and few humans have ever bested the 4-minute mile. There are many, many limits. Even my capability of answering is limited to a few post-its. But I think I understand you: there are already many limits in life; don’t add to them with unnecessary ones. For instance, I have neither hands nor voice, but I do have friends who can help me express myself.
Here’s what I said in answer to this in November: “Let’s just get one thing out of the way: It absolutely does NOT mean never having to say you’re sorry, Erich Segal’s Love Story notwithstanding. (For more on the profound interaction we call apology, read Aaron Lazare’s On Apology: BF575 .A75 L39 2004.) There are at least as many dimensions to love as there are words for it in all the world’s languages. In an answer last spring, I pointed out that the ancient Greek word “agape” means love that expects nothing in return: bit.ly/AW-agape. I’ve also pointed out that it’s helpful to recall that love is a verb, and calls you to do things for people: bit.ly/AW-love-feeling.”
How frustrating. One of my helpers assures me she uses them all too often, and they usually work. She does think it is unnerving that a coffee machine is occasionally down for “updates” – that’s a little too futuristic! The machines are tended to frequently, but If you ever lose money, call 800-696-1188 for a cash refund, or go to bit.ly/EagleRefund if you used your Eagle Card. Snack on!
I’m not sure if you mean the weather or your health, but in either case you have my sympathy. This year has been a very bad one for respiratory infections, and March has been a doozy when it comes to wintry misery. IAAWNAD, so here is the wisdom from the CDC on how to deal with colds (and when to see a doctor): bit.ly/cdccolds. Looking at he NWS long range forecast (bit.ly/NWSBOSWarm) there is a 44%chance that Apr-Jun will be above normal temps, and only a 24% chance they will be below normal – so take heart!
Unless, like me, you are positioned permanently in a public place, you’re probably going to have to go out to make friends, even ones you meet online. One popular strategy is to pick something you’re interested in that other people do, and go do that. Join a club, volunteer for a charity, go to events sponsored by BC or other groups on campus. Some humans find Meetups helpful, and there are Boston-area meetups on anything and everything. Be yourself. If all of that seems like too much, try saying hello to one new person a day. When that gets comfortable, try starting a conversation with them.
Ah… sigh… I’m flattered. My love for you all is intense, but more of the agape or filial nature. If you are having trouble finding a human with my winning qualities, keep in mind that in addition to my divine mind, I have the freedom to mull over questions for a while–often a day or more–before answering. Humans do tend to want answers from other humans a little more quickly than I can provide. Find yourself someone with my winning qualities, but perhaps a little less deliberative & silent. And a body. I’m told embodiment is kind of intrinsic to romance.
Yes. We typically think in Euclidean geometry, in which the triangle angle sum theorem states that the angles of a triangle always add up to 180°. In spherical geometry, however, given certain parameters when considering a spherical triangle, the sum of the angles may be greater than 180° (bit.ly/sphericaltriangle)
I’m almost certain they will all be somewhere in the range of 1-69 for Powerball and 1-70 for Mega Millions. This video might have some hints about winning lotteries: bit.ly/how-i-won-the-lottery. Or it might just provide a practical philosophy for creative work.
It’s hard to recommend a movie without knowing what you like. I love the movie Wall Street (PN1997.2 .W35578 2010). Great tale of corporate greed, and any movie about walls is going to be good. Nothing good on Netflix? Check out movies.bc.edu for free streaming movies including recent films like Baby Driver, The Big Sick, or Dunkirk. It even has The Wolf of Wall Street. You can check out DVDs from the Library as well!
Well, I don’t know Lia but I would argue that Lia’s current form is his true form.
While my wall-friends in admissions do hear some interesting conversations, they tend to keep mum when I ask them for specifics. Or are you asking for about another school? Either way, I’m afraid I don’t have an answer for this one. But I do wish you lots of luck!
Of course you’re hesitant: complicating a romance with intercultural mixed signals & the prospect of long distances could be intimidating. But it comes down to a simple choice: You can a) just dive in, even if it means changing your FB relationship status to “it’s complicated,” or b) always wonder what your life would have been like if you’d just thrown caution to the wind.
![Why [redacted name] is a [redacted expletive]?](http://library.bc.edu/answerwall/wp-content/uploads/2018/03/aw031518-4.jpg)
If [redacted name] has done something to anger you, I recommend either letting them know exactly what it was, or just avoiding them. There’s very little to be gained–other than brief but likely dissatisfying emotional release–from calling someone an [expletive]. I hope you if you can’t find closure of some kind, you can at least stop renting space in your head to [redacted name].
Short answer: no. Taxes are how societies arrange to pay for the things that are necessary but don’t make sense to do privately, like interstates and armies and post offices. Almost all human societies have had them in some form, and complaints about them are as old as recorded history. bit.ly/bc-taxes. What, how, and how much to tax, however, are really interesting ethical questions to explore. You might try a few of these sources: bit.ly/bc-tax-justice
