
I think it’s more likely you’re an absolute unit.

Answering questions at Boston College O’Neill Library

Research has shown that weekly appointments are more effective for most people because it gives you time in between sessions to reflect and try to make small changes. Of course if you are experiencing a crisis, that’s a different story! There is an emergency clincian line always available: bit.ly/4sL6xPi

It’s not just you, things are rough for lots of people right now. The most important thing for humans seems to be other humans, so my advice is to reach out to someone. Call or text that friend you haven’t talked to in a while, or your relative you miss. Do something nice for a stranger. The rocks don’t go away, but you can laugh with a friend while you clean up the glass which gets everywhere.

See my answer to the other rock recipient: the best path is to find other humans in the same boat and work together.

Yes, with serious caveats. The world of ultrarunning is intense and definitely not for beginners. While people technically can do it, there’s lots to consider in terms of physiology and decision-making to avoid injury and illness. If you’re serious, you should take a look at some ultrarunning resources to learn more about training, gear, and reputable races, such as UltraRunning magazine: bit.ly/ultrarunningmag

You’ll need to work at it: find people who support you and stick by them, remind yourself daily of your goals and dreams, focus on the discipline of finding positions and sending applications like a star administrative assistant for you, and when regret hits, write down 3 successes, no matter how small.

I use a paid account with bit.ly to generate my short links and any QR codes I need and that works fine. Google Chrome’s Share menu has a built-in way to do them: bit.ly/bcl-google-qr You can also use Apple’s Shortcuts app to create them: bit.ly/bcl-apple-qr

If you are referring to the debate from the Twilight book series, I don’t have a preference so I’ll defer to the author Stephanie Meyer: bit.ly/edward-jacob-twilight

Yes. This is apparently the way. And for what it’s worth, my sources tell me that it gets harder to recreate the spontaneous college experience of meeting new people as you get older. Be brave! It’s worth it, even if it doesn’t work out the way you hope.

Chances are good you know some things he enjoys by now. Offer them but don’t worry too much if he’s not up for it right now, that will return. A situationship is a relationship pretending not to be, but losing one is still a form of grief, and everybody handles that at their own speed. Be a friend, give him space if he wants it, that is the best way.

I’m honored to have served as a neutral go-between.

I’m sorry you’re feeling lonely. Here’s something to try: ask friends & family for care. You can ask directly (“I need a hug”) but that can be a challenging thing to do. Here’s a trick: offer a hug to someone, especially if they look a little down. That will help chip away at the separation. Or just offer a kind word: “you’re looking good today,” or “I was just remembering that time we…” If you find it too hard to try reaching out to people this way, I recommend talking to someone about it, for instance, BC’s counseling services: bit.ly/BC-counseling.

I don’t get out to eat much, but I asked my library helpers for their input and here are their thoughts:

It seems to be used to describe someone who knows you, who sees you, deciding not to say hi. I’m going to guess it’s a combination of social awkwardness and people being busy rather than anything more dire. Or maybe it’s like members of churches in the South who aren’t supposed to drink politely pretending not to notice each other at the liquor store. More thoughts in The Gavel: bit.ly/bc-lookaway