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Hi Wall, just checking up on you.

How are you doing boo? Are you doing anything fabulous for the summer? Oh by the way, thank you for the music selection. I do love me some Etta James. Talk to you soon?!

Oh, you know me, kind of a homebody, and I’ve got other walls and some floors and ceilings kind of depending on me to stay put. Which reminds me of another Etta James song, the one that started her career in 1955: Wallflower. bit.ly/etta-wallflower

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Can I get a food deliver service sent to BC?

So if I ordered say HelloFresh or some other grocery/meal type delivery service, would the mailroom process it fast enough for me to get the package before the food spoils? I want to be able to cook but I want to avoid grocery stores as much as possible. Thanks wall!

HelloFresh and similar services tend to deliver by UPS or FedEx. You are notified of its arrival by email and the package goes a Campus Mail Services location for you to pick up. The problem might be the limited pickup hours there, see: bit.ly/BCPackage. I spoke to a helpful human at ResLife and they said students often get deliveries from local supermarkets like Stop & Shop, only the delivery has to be outside the res – that might work for you?

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Treadmills: Dear Wall, how did you deal with feelings of disorientation,

futility and existential dread when thinking about your future and your path in life when you were younger. gruezi and goodbye

Humans get different kinds of existential dread, but frequent causes seem to be fear that nothing will change from right now, that it’s too late to get started, and that nothing one does matters. Those are all false in different ways, but I’m not saying that to wave away how debilitating they are. Those feelings are real, and they have real effects. But they’re still false. It might help to talk to a therapist if the dread is long-lasting. It might help to talk to a career coach if you’re worried about that kind of thing. You asked about me. The library I’m part of was finished in 1983 and between then and a couple of years ago I was mostly doing wall stuff, before I got my break into answering questions. Give it time, it’ll be OK. Or at least it’ll be different. Warm wishes.

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Is it possible for a person to love some one and yet not to miss them when they are not around?

Absolutely. There are many kinds of love (8 according to the ancient Greeks) and not all of them are manifest as passionate heart longing when someone is gone. Additionally, everyone expresses love differently. It’s not uncommon to love family, but not necessarily miss them when they’re not around (or even sometimes be glad they’re gone). The same can be true of any relationship in your life.

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Thanks wall! We took your recommendation and change the Ig name. You should follow our Ig! I feel so validated that so many people struggle with the same barriers and challenges from the institution as I do. I also feel so sad that so many people are suffering alone without access to the support they deserve and needed.

Just checked out the account again. Love the new name and bio. I’m so glad you can give people a place to tell their stories and feel heard. Mental health services are so diffcult to manage even in the best of scenarios, but colleges across the US (not just BC) continue to struggle with providing the care that so many people deserve. Much of that is more systemic than just BC; it has to do with the entire US healthcare system and the (often perverse) profit motives we’ve set up therein. One last piece of advice if I can be so bold: please make sure to keep your own mental health in mind. It is very easy to feel like you owe these students and alums a piece of yourself to help them and that you have to continue this project even if it becomes overwhelming. These stories are heartbreaking, and that can really grind some people down to read them over and over again. If it does get to be too much, it’s OK to take a break. Be well.

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Boy Problems: Hi answer wall, I like this boy and we talk everyday but

I can’t tell if he likes me back and 2. I can’t tell if he’s gay. I feel like we both like each other but are both too nervous to make a move because we’ve gotten so close over the summer. We went out to dinner a few weeks ago and he paid! was he trying to imply its a date? I also dont wanna make a move if he is gay and i embarrass both of us.

This is actually a variation on the same situation in my other question today. In theory all you need to do is ask “Are you gay?” and then say either “yay!” or “wanna go on a date?” depending on the answer. But the Wall totally understands how tough actually doing that is. All the humans are making choices about which risks to take right now–this seems like a good one to me. Good luck!