There’s no getting around it, people have done mean things and said judgmental things. A good many others have done heroic things and said things that were honest, thoughtful, and/or caring. I recommend seeking out more of the latter, and attempting to avoid the former as much as you can. If you can’t avoid it, perhaps you can meet it with equanimity & silence, kind of like a wall. Meanness expects (and thrives on) mean responses. Starved of reaction, it often recedes.