I’m plural (I’m a tulpa system) and I want to tell my parents. How should I come out to them?

Both of them think “hearing voices” is something weird, disordered and mad.

Sharing important, meaningful, and personal information about yourself to your loved ones can be incredibly daunting. I think practicing what you want to say with a trusted friend or therapist would be a really good thing to do. Also, you may want to map out how you would respond given different reactions you receive – again this is something a trusted friend or therapist could help with.

Can a stepfather merry his stepson? (It’s complicated)

It depends partly on whether or not the step-parent legally adopts the child; if they do, then the child is legally indistinguishable from a biological child. It also depends on state law, which varies. Woody Allen famously married his stepdaughter; I’m not sure how he worked out the legality. Social acceptance is another issue entirely, as are the emotional impacts on all parties. In other words, “it’s complicated” means that if someone wants to navigate this path with minimal harm, it will take a lot of work. Someone would need to consult with a wide range of services to do it well: family law, couple and individual counseling, and probably a licensed social worker, all of whom may refer involved parties to additional services.

How can I stop letting what people say affect me so much?

How can I stop letting what people say affect me so much? I also take things in a worse way than someone likely intends.
How can I stop letting what people say affect me so much? I also take things in a worse way than someone likely intends.

A counselor (bit.ly/BC-counseling) should be able to help you explore both why you weight others’ words too heavily, and help practice strategies for letting go. One of my helpers describes it as turning up the volume of positive self-talk enough that it drowns out the excess criticism they internalize.

Who created you?

Hey wall I gotta say this is the most romantic idea I've ever seen on campus. Who created you? I'm in love.
Hey wall I gotta say this is the most romantic idea I’ve ever seen on campus. Who created you? I’m in love.

Although my Mom and Dad are walls on the North Shore and Manhattan, respectively, the idea for me here at Boston College Libraries came from…. another Wall! (bit.ly/FamousBCWalls). I am delighted you find me a romantic idea, and I love you too, in a platonic, wallish way.

¿Cómo puedo encontrar el amor de mi vida?

¿Cómo puedo encontrar el amor de mi vida? [Response: ¿Puedo practicar español contigo?]

Pregunté a mis ayudantes cómo habían encontrado el amor de su vida. Las respuestas fueron dulces, aleatorias y ridículas. ¡Solo sigue viviendo! Y la otra pregunta – ¿quieres practicar conmigo o con lo de la primera pregunta? De todas maneras te recomiendo BC Language Lab (bit.ly/BostonCollegeLL)

I transferred into MCAS from Lynch to change my major end of sophomore year.

Will I be eligible for degree honors like cum laude etc? I’m worried I have spent enough time in MCAS, but I’ve worked so hard.

I will chat with some Morrissey walls and get back to you as soon as I have more news.

The walls of Morrissey told me that latin honors are calculated by Student Services at the time of graduation, and for an internal transfer, they cover the entire time at BC, whether you were in Lynch or MCAS. Keep up the good work!

Boston College in Boston or Boston College in California?

Boston College in Boston or Boston College in California?
Boston College in Boston or Boston College in California?

So, I (the Wall) personally reside in Chestnut Hill (in Newton), MA. Our campus essentially sits on sections of Newton and Boston. However, if you wanted to connect with BC folks in California, there are robust alumni groups located everywhere that are a quick google search away!

How do ik when i have succeeded

How do ik when i have succeeded
How do ik when i have succeeded

Don’t take anyone else’s measure of success; only you get to define what is meaningful in your own life. Spend some serious time reflecting on what your goals are, and then you will have a better sense of how far you have come and where you need to work to achieve your own definition of success.

BOS <--> Ithaca

drawing of a cat face and dog face, with a heart-shaped dotted line around them and "BOS" and "Ithaca" with directional arrows
BOS <–> Ithaca

Hoping those in Ithaca and those in Boston can soon be reunited ❤️. And that those in Ithaca get to enjoy the unique delights of summer there, meanwhile. Especially the waterfalls.

Where the water at?

Why are we in Africa? Where the water at?
Why are we in Africa? Where the water at?

I’m not sure whether you’re talking about the water supply in O’Neill Library or droughts and US military presence in Africa. If the former, take heart! Ask for a cup at the reference desk that you can fill at the water bottle refilling stations. If the latter, well, the US troop buildup in Africa has been going on for close to two decades, leaning heavily on Congress’ 2001 Authorization for Use of Military Force (AUMF) for military action against those responsible for 9/11.

I feel like I’ve lost my confidence a couple of years ago

I feel like I've lost my confidence a couiple of years ago. How to establish it again & why do I feel like I am not good at anything?
I feel like I’ve lost my confidence a couple of years ago. How to establish it again & why do I feel like I am not good at anything?

When you’re constantly learning new things, confidence can take a big hit. Make sure to give yourself some continuity. Did you stop doing something (playing an instrument or a sport, reading a favorite genre, etc.) that you enjoy? When learning new things, confidence often comes from success at meaningful tasks: remember to note your successes and reflect on what they mean to you personally. (Succeeding at meaningless tasks doesn’t necessarily increase confidence.) It’s also human nature to focus on failures and forget successes. Did you fall down? Don’t forget to count getting back up as a success.

Writers something beautiful…

A thing of beauty is a joy for ever:
Its loveliness increases; it will never
Pass into nothingness; but still will keep
A bower quiet for us, and a sleep
Full of sweet dreams, and health, and quiet breathing.

–John Keats, from Endymion

I’m a student from Boston University.

I'm a student from Boston University. This month I live near BC and come here very often. I run at BC, Cestnut Hill Reservoir and green areas nearby (explored all of them). On 6/23/2022, I'll head to Middlebur College for 7-week Portuguese immersion program!
I’m a student from Boston University. This month I live near BC and come here very often. I run at BC, Cestnut Hill Reservoir and green areas nearby (explored all of them). On 6/23/2022, I’ll head to Middlebur College for 7-week Portuguese immersion program!